Lets start with Confession Time
: I think I'm falling OUT of love with KA, damn fast..
DNF-ed at a point where I was forced to choose between committing a suicide or quitting the suicide-inducing ANNOYING and BORING book.
Let's freaking talk bout the BITCH
She was a SPINSTER at the age of 45, thanks to her BITCHINESS. Okay, I was kidding, that's just not the real reason, just MY kind of EXPLANATION. The truth is, I have no fucking idea why she was still single at that GOLDEN age since till the point where I stopped, she was having not one, but FUCKING FIVE
men attracted to her. The only acceptable explanation for this is she might have been FULLY covered by an invisible cloak for the past 45 years.
I didn't have much problem with her age (although at times I couldn't help glancing at my mom thinking, wow, can't believe I'm reading a story bout someone older than my own mom! Hold the vomit!) but I have LOTS of problems with her fucking PERSONALITY.1. LETS BE FUCKING EMOTIONAL AND THEN FORGET EVERYTHING TO OGLE A HOTTIE AT A FUNERAL!
From being homicidal:
“Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.”
My mouth filled with saliva when I heard these words, my eyes—shaded by both sunglasses and a big black hat—moving from the shining casket covered in a massive spray of deep red roses to the preacher standing at its side.
I wanted to rise up from my chair, snatch the words from the air and shove them down his throat.
This was an unusual reaction for me. I wasn’t like that.
But he was talking about Gran.
Gran, my Gran, the Gran whose body was in that casket.
She wasn’t exactly young, this was true. I knew it was coming, seeing as she was ninety-three.
That didn’t mean I wanted her to be gone. I never wanted her to be gone.
Outside of Henry, she was the only person I had. The only person in this whole world.
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.
Gran wasn’t dust.
My Gran was everything.
2. WHEN IT COMES TO BEING PISSED OFF, BE PISSED OFF AT THE WRONG PERSON JUST BECAUSE THEY ARE UGLY AND FORGIVE THE CULPRIT JUST BECAUSE HE'S HOT!
They stopped when my sunglasses hit his.
And when they did, my breath also stopped.
This was because in all my life, and I’d had a long one, and in all my wandering, and I’d wandered far, I’d never seen a man like him.
His black hair had a hint of silvery-gray in it. It was thick and clipped well but in a way that was not a nod to style, instead it was apparent he didn’t want to spend time on it so his style was wash and go.
Even so, it looked good on him.
So he was late to the lawyer's office..and she was left with a lawyer(?) there..
The lawyer, Terry, was like this to her:
I stood from my chair in the waiting room and took Terry Baginski’s outstretched hand, noting her hair was pulled severely back from her face and secured in the back in a girlish ponytail.
I noted this thinking that there were many women in the world with strong or delicate enough features to be able to wear that hairstyle at any age.
She just wasn’t one of them.
This thought wasn’t kind. However, it was true and I caught myself wishing I could explain this to her as well as share that she may wish to use a less heavy hand with makeup and perhaps buy a suit that didn’t scream power! but instead implied femininity, which, if done right, was much more powerful.
While for him:
It was far less formal attire than his suit of the day before but, oddly, it suited him far better.
Terry did this:
“I’ll send someone in to get you some coffee. But as Mr. Spear is late, and I’m quite busy, if you don’t’ mind, I’ll take this opportunity to speak to a few colleagues about some important issues that need to be discussed.”
I did mind.
Jake aka Mr. Spear did arrived late,
“..He said he’s been held up but he’s five minutes from the offices,”
What did Terry get?
“I’ve no idea how you can be behind seeing as you were delayed in meeting me in reception. Not to mention, since that time you’ve not let Mr. Spear’s late arrival deter you from continuing with your work even though a long time client’s granddaughter was waiting and she wasn’t even offered a magazine to occupy her time.”
p/s: What did she fucking THINK? It's a lawyer office, not a fucking LIBRARY! They offered her COFFEE for GOD SAKE! And lastly, DIDN'T she FUCKING hear it? She was BUSY!
And now, what did Jake get?
My eyes caught his and I noted three things instantly.
One was the fact that he had unusual gray eyes. I couldn’t quite put my finger on what was unusual about them except for the fact that they were alarmingly attractive.
He also smelled good. I’d inhaled the scent of a variety of men’s colognes but not one was that alluring. It was, as was everything about him, aggressively masculine, assaulting my senses, making it hard for me to breathe.
And last, his body was far bigger and more imposing than it was from a distance.
“My apologies,” I went on to murmur, putting pressure on my hand as an indication he should let it go.
Yes, you read right, SHE fucking apologized to the one who should've been apologizing (he didn't explain his lateness and she was magically okay with this, hottie and all -_-) while being fucking MAD at the lawyer.3. WHEN YOU DON'T WANT TO HAVE DINNER WITH SOMEONE, FUCKING AGREE TO IT AND THEN STOOD THEM UP DESPITE THE FACT THAT THEY'VE NEVER REALLY DONE ANYTHING TO FUCKING ANNOY YOU. AND OH, DON'T FORGET TO ENJOY YOUR MEAL WHILE THEY WAITED FOR YOUR NON-ARRIVAL.
He asked her to have dinner with him..and she fucking agreed to it.
“Dinner,” he encouraged softly. “Just dinner. You think I’m a dick, that’s it. Sayin’ that, I’m not gonna be a dick to Lydie’s girl because that woman meant a lot to me, to my kids, and that’s just not gonna happen. You feel that from me anyway, we’re done. But give it dinner.”
I could give it dinner.
In actuality, I could tell him I could give it dinner because it was clear he wasn’t going to give up until I did so.
Then I would not go to dinner. The town was not big but Lavender House wasn’t exactly on Main Street. In the brief time I was there, I could avoid him.
Then I’d be gone.
Therefore, I decided to do just that.
“Fine. Dinner,” I lied.
But like a real bitch, she stood him up and dared to blame him for it.
“Jesus Christ, Josie, you stood me up.”
“I can obviously see that you’d see it that way but since I didn’t actually wish to go to dinner with you in the first place, I don’t see it the same way.”
“Fuckin’ hell,” he murmured.
“And really,” I foolishly went on, “your language is quite—”
“Do not fuckin’ tell me what my language is,” he cut me off to bite out. “And do not stand across Lydie’s fuckin’ kitchen and give me your bullshit,” he ordered and I blinked.
Then my back snapped straight. “Pardon me?”
“You’re standin’ in Lydie’s kitchen knowin’ what she wanted for you, and what that was is me.”
He jerked his thumb to himself on his last word but he wasn’t done speaking.
“You jacked me around last night, made my daughter change her plans and she was lookin’ forward to that shit. Made me sit in a restaurant by my-fuckin’-self for forty-five fuckin’ minutes waitin’ on your ass, when not a lot of people have forty-five minutes of their lives to piss away and I’m one of them. You’re a no show and you give me this bullshit?”
(FUCKING glad that Jake gave the bitch that lashing LOL)
And guess what? She enjoyed her food while at it!
All of which I’d eaten that night, remembering Gran and maybe not enjoying it as much as when she’d partaken of the same with me, but still enjoying it.
I was like, really BITCH?! And she didn't even feel guilty about it until it was pointed out!
No fucking wonder she was alone at the age of 45.
Seriously, if my copy was a paperback and not a digital ebook, I would have fucking burned the fucking thing!Side note:
KA's books Cliches..
-For once, can the kids just dislike the heroine and they stop being captivated from the first meeting all the fucking time?
-For once, can the hero please fucking stop being so fucking good at sex all the fucking time?
-For once, can the hero please be a bit awkward with their kids and stop being father of the years all the fucking time?
-For once, can the heroine please do not have an impeccable taste when it comes to their outfits all the fucking time?
And oh, if you're wondering bout the hero, then just read Motorcycle Man instead of reading this. Jake is kinda Tack's twin. Fucking the same to me. Convos. Kids. Rough. Owner of stuff. Shit like that. And obviously, nothing we have never read from KA.